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McCain Replaces Palin With Startled Deer
Andy Borowitz 10/6/2008
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Hoofed Running Mate Could Be Game-Changer.

With less than a week to go before the crucial vice-presidential debate, GOP presidential nominee John McCain announced today that he was replacing his running mate, Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, with a startled deer.

According to campaign insiders, the decision to select a hoofed mammal to replace Gov. Palin evolved after Sen. McCain watched his running mate's performance in a series of interviews with CBS's Katie Couric.

"Good Lord, a startled deer could do better than that," Sen. McCain reportedly said, prompting his aides to draw up a shortlist of startled deer.

The Arizona senator supposedly brushed aside concerns that a startled deer would wilt under the pressure of a televised debate, telling aides, "At least a goddamn deer won't go on about Alaska being close to Russia."

The McCain campaign said today that Sen. McCain's new running mate, Bucky the Red Deer, would not be made available to the press prior to the debate.

"Bucky is very much a work in progress," said McCain campaign manager Rick Davis. "Right now we're working on keeping him from bolting off the stage."

Bucky's opponent in the upcoming debate, Delaware Sen. Joseph Biden, appeared today to be trying to manage expectations for the high-stakes face-off with his four-legged rival.

"Bucky the Red Deer is articulate, bright and clean," Sen. Biden said. "That's storybook, man."

Elsewhere, former "American Idol" star Clay Aiken revealed that he was gay in an exclusive interview with Duh magazine.

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Palin interviews COLOR
By John Cole - The Scranton Times-Tribune * Posted 9/26/2008 12:00:00 AM
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Palin interviews COLOR
© Copyright 2008  John Cole - All Rights Reserved.

Posted By: Don  on Monday, October 06, 2008

Poor Andy.



Were his actual stated opinion other than the above, witnesses would describe his reaction to his former friends - and now suddenly vicious Manhattan critics intent upon lynching a nonconformist - as the deer in the, etc.



Ergo: How in the world could he have written anything ELSE other than what he has written?



And another reason for pity.  The "deer" analogy has been done to death.  His originality, greatly appreciated by this fan in the past, today is absent.



This eventually happens to all great comedians; witness Leno and Lettermen.  



If you're going to deteriorate along the same lines, for goodness sakes, get TV Network paychecks in exchange for the willing fossilization of your talent - not a thousand here and there from the petty auxiliary sources.



Anyone who can turn material like this in and get paid for it - without an objection from an editor that this is stale stuff - surely, has little, if any, respect for his employer.



Send the money back, Andy.  This is beneath you.  Try again.


Posted By: Dan  on Thursday, October 09, 2008

I thought this was kinda funny...thanks for the laugh!


Posted By: ml johnstone  on Tuesday, October 14, 2008

From a Canadian: Enjoy your comments up here. Some of you might even be able to see us.

Rudolph has been seen in parts farther up in our country.But where I live, these darn deer are such a pest we are beginning to cull them. They eat our flowers, take the lowest fruits, get very lazy and destroy entire ecosystems.Our deer are no longer dear.Part of the problem with them is a Disneyland approach so people think they are Bambi and feed them.

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